Age 5: Driving in the car with my dad, he once asked me to hold his coffee. I spent the rest of the trip crouched on the floor, hiding and praying that the police wouldn’t catch us for drinking and driving.
Age 7: One night I borrowed my brother’s extra fuzzy blanket. I spent the entire night wide awake and afraid of the indoor lightning storm.
The next morning my mom told me about static cling.
Age 10: A lady on a TV show had cancer. When she touched her hair it fell out in clumps. I tried the ‘cancer test’ too. I could pull out my hair easily enough. I spent most of grade five thinking I wouldn’t live to see grade six.
Age 10 and 3/4: Another lady on TV said a lack of vitamins could lead to hair loss. I was relieved to find out I probably didn’t have cancer after all. I vowed to eat more vegetables.
Age 13: I read a lot of books about girls who saw ghost horses or who discovered new worlds. I desperately wanted to experience an adventure like the ones in my books so I decided to pretend to see a ghost during my class presentation.
Too shy to scream AHHH! A GHOST! I repeatedly looked into a corner of the room, trying to look scared of a ghost.
The teacher just thought I was nervous.
And when my friend asked What was wrong? You looked so upset. I couldn’t bring myself to actually tell her I’d seen a ghost when I hadn’t. I replied Oh, nothing.
Age 17: Driving down a gravel road in the prairies, I lost control of the car. As the car rolled over and over I kept thinking Am I dead yet? Am I dead yet? I wanted to be conscious of the moment I lost consciousness.
I’m not dead. Crap, mom is going to kill me.
Worried that my mom was going to be upset about the car, I tried to lift the car to set it right-side-up… kind of uncool. Not sure what I was thinking.
So there you have it, the confessions of a kooky kid.
How about you? Anything you’d like to confess? Your secrets are safe with me.